SUV drivers really do suck

According to market research conducted by car manufacturers, SUV drivers are insecure, vain, self-centered, antisocial, and bad drivers.

“If you have a sport utility, you can have the smoked windows, put the children in the back and pretend you’re still single.”

—David Bostwick, Chrysler’s market research director

Still, on the plus side the occupant death rate is higher in SUVs than in cars. Higher still for really big SUVs. SUV drivers are also much more likely to run over their own offspring.

Unfortunately, SUVs kill five times as many non-SUV-driving people as normal cars do.

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