Movie magic

Hollywood loves remakes. The trouble is, they only ever seem to remake movies that were perfectly good the first time. The thinking seems to be that since Psycho was a great movie the first time, all we have to do is make a near-exact copy, and couples will drop $20 to go see it again. The other popular option is to take a perfectly good movie that suffers from having too many English or Australian people in it, and make a crappy copy on the cheap in Hollywood.

But of course, only an idiot will pay to go see a cheap knock-off of The Italian Job when they can watch the real thing on DVD for about the same amount of money.

So, it seems to me that what Hollywood should be doing is focusing on movies that they can actually improve by remaking them. Which means, setting the bar really low. So, I have a dream…

Someone needs to do a remake of Plan 9 From Outer Space. No, really. Pitch it as The Day The Earth Stood Still and Independence Day meet Invasion of the Body Snatchers. Use state of the art CGI for the aliens, have them shoot vicious metallic electrodes, give them a big impressive saucer, and make them kill and resurrect an entire army rather than just three people.

I just know Tim Burton could do it, if he’d let himself. And think, unlike with Planet of the Apes, there’d be no risk of ending up with something cheesier or more nonsensical than the original.