Live from Austin!

CLUB TALK, a Glossary of Terms

Schmoozing

the art of shallow conversation regarding “in” topics with the intention of making a possible biz connection.

Scenester

scene maker

Poser

a hipster who is obsessed with sticking out in a crowd

Trendoid

obsessively trendy, too obvious

Wannabe

someone who wants to be in the trendy scene but hasn’t crossed the line. Everyone starts as a wannabe

Swag

promotional premiums; Webster’s Dictionary definition: loot

Club Rats

patrons that go to clubs seven nights a week, and whose entire social lives revolve around nightclubs

Doorman

person who guards the velvet rope and decides who gets into a trendy nightclub

The List

the guest list; you have to know somebody or be somebody to be on it

O.P.s

other people’s cigarettes

Club Hopping

visiting many clubs in one night

Drink Ticket

a piece of paper good for a free drink

Can I Groove A Jump Off Your Bake

May I light my cigarette off of yours?

—Camel Cigarettes Trend Influence Marketing Program document

The local supermarket chain is H-E-B. They’ve been around for 100 years. If you look at the bottom of the web site, you’ll find out why they’re called H-E-B:

Copyright 2001-2005, H.E. Butt Grocery Company

Yes, H-E-B is H.E. Butt, founded by Florence Butt, and still owned by Butts today.

Obviously I find this endlessly amusing.

The generic products they sell are pretty good quality, so we buy them a lot. Instead of Coke or Pepsi, the refrigerator is stocked up with Butt soda. I’m also quite a fan of the cheap Butt burritos, and I just enjoyed some Butt yogurt.

There’s a gas station at one of the big Butt groceries nearby, selling discount fuel; I must remember to fill the car with Butt gas. We don’t tend to have much use for the Butt pharmacy, though.

Oh, and the supermarket chain decided to call their mascot for kids the H-E-Buddy—which of course, means he’s the Butt Buddy.